Hope this New Year's Eve is as F-U-N as the Last!!

WE GOT THE HOUSE!

They accepted our offer!!

DeMotte, here we come!!

Ponderosa Sun Club

As I have mentioned, DeMotte is where Lee and I have been looking for houses. Well, in our search, we did a Googld Map of DeMotte to start checking out the lay of the land. This is what we saw:

Popular searches near this location: Ponderosa Sun Club. What in the heck is that? All I could think of was Ponderosa, the trashy buffet where I have seen some of the fattest people ever.

We click on it. I recommend you do the same, but not on a work computer.

Turns out the Ponderosa Sun Club is a nudist colony. This place is even the host of the best nude beauty contest each year that brings in stars like Ron Jeremy, Verne Troyer and many adult film stars. How did this place exist 50 miles from where I grew up without me ever knowing about it?!?!

So, we asked our realtor about the nudist colony and he said that there are actually TWO nearby! At least I know Fubar will come visit now!!

Christmas is over...

Back to your regularly scheduled blogs.

Christmas was EXTREMELY busy, as most of our trips back to Indiana are. We got back late on Wednesday night.

Thursday I woke up early to go on a field trip with my mom's class. My mom runs an alternative school for emotionally handicapped students that have been kicked out of their respective high schools. And we took this class to Chicago to the Museum of Science & Industry. WOW. The museum was filled to the brim with excited little kids. I thought I was going to go crazy. I can't imagine working there. I would never have children of my own if I was around that everyday.

After spending close to 12 hours with a group of ADHD teenagers, I had a severe thirst for a beer. We all met up at our friend's family restaurant and then proceeded on to Harry's. Lee got sent home early with his brother because he was on his way to another pass-out episode. That left me, Jamie, and an already blacked out Zach. Jamie & I ended up closing down Harry's (proud to say I can still do that!) and getting a ride home in a Bud Light delivery van! SWEET! Me, Jamie & a friend Steve ended up crashing on Jamie's mom's living room floor. Jamie's mom was not too pleased with us... I ended up getting about 3.5 hours of sleep on a hard floor. And somehow didn't even have a hangover the next morning. Amazing!

Friday after eating some life-saving breakfast at Triple XXX, we showered and picked up my mom and Lee's parents and headed to DeMotte for some house shopping. We looked at 5 houses and really LOVED one of them. We spent a good hour at this one house. After that, we headed home to Lafayette and met a couple & their baby up for dinner. I wish I could have been a little more sociable, but after 3 hours of sleep, I was exhausted. Sorry Justin & Jill.

Saturday we had the Puetz family Christmas. This is Lee's grandma. In her family, there are 61 people. This year, SOMEHOW, 60 of the 61 made it. The day starts out with some food. Then pictures of every family and many other combos. Then every single person opens their present from Gma Puetz. Then we do another little gift thing where we sit in a circle and pass gifts around. THEN, we do another gift exchange. After all that, I joined a game of Balderdash. I joined the game late and ended up winning. Apparently I'm a good bull shitter. Now I desperately want my own game of Balderdash so I can practice!!


Sunday we helped move the last of my Grandma's stuff from her HUGE house in Lafayette to her new condo in Kokomo. Then we went out to BW3's for some big beers with Lee's brother's friends. I got a little awkward with it all because I "have history" two of my brother-in-law's friends and they were both there... And are apparently roommates now. In my defense, Lafayette is a small town. It is bound to happen.


Monday I helped my mom finish up her holiday shopping. Then we had the Klemme Christmas for Lee's immediate family. This started at about 4pm and ended after Midnight Mass. Phew! I'm ready for bed!! Lee's brother Matt was struggling to keep Christmas dinner down. Apparently BW3's was a bit too much booze for him! And I had no hangover again! Maybe that pukey pants thing was just a phaze that I have now outgrown!! (Knock on wood.)


Tuesday we got up early and drove to Kokomo. We had to get there early so that we could do gifts with my mom first. Then my uncle got there and we did gifts with HIS family. Then my aunt and her family got there and we ate. Then we sat around shooting the shit for a couple hours. Good times!!


Wednesday we decided to go back up to DeMotte to look at the house we liked again and make an offer. There had been a lot of snow on the ground the first time we looked and we wanted to check things out while we could see the ground! We still loved the place and made an offer!! Now we're just waiting for them to accept/deny/counter offer. I can't wait to move back to Indiana!!
After this we headed down to the Indy airport to fly home. Besides an INSANE child abusing the back of my seat on the first flight and a 30 minute delay, the trip home went smoothly!! It felt great to sleep in my own bed again!

Merry Christmas to all!!

I'm heading out to Indiana. Displaced Hoosier will be on Christmas break for the next week. Hope everyone has a veeeeeeeeeery Merry Christmas!!

Jamie's visit to Norfolk

Jamie Lynn made the drive down to Norfolk to visit Lee and I this weekend. Jamie is a grad student at Ohio University (NOT Ohio State University) and she has close to TWO months off for Christmas. Insane!

Jamie got in on Friday evening. She had to go through the Hampton Bridge/Tunnel and she was not a big fan. Apparently the thought of being under water freaked her out.

On Friday we decided to take our friend Tom's yacht to downtown Norfolk to hit up the bars at Waterside. This is the best way for Tom to avoid driving drunk... Take your house TO the bars!! It also means that we can booze it up on the way. Unfortunately for Jamie, it meant that we now went OVER the Hampton Bridge/Tunnel. She didn't like being on top of the tunnel either...

We parked his boat at the marina and made our way to The Southern Star. This is a country bar that is pretty new. It isn't as good as the dueling piano bar that used to be there... We drank and tried to learn some line dances. Jamie got some unwanted dance lessons from some dude decked out in cowboy gear. Jamie wasn't familiar at the two-step. This made for a pretty funny scene. Especially at one point when Jamie knocked the cowboy's hat off with some of her "dance moves". What was strange about the bar was that the best line dancer in the place was black and the guy that was on the dance floor the most was Asian. Not too many country bars can say that!! We ended up sleeping on Tom's boat and taking a cab home the next morning.

Saturday we were in a world of pain. Ouch. We ended up lounging most the day and watching Lost. We did rally a little late in the evening and turned Lost into a drinking game. Every time they say "Jack" take two drinks (Jamie wanted to do a shot of Jack. We would have died.), everytime they say "island" take one, everytime they say "run" take one drink, etc.

Sunday we decided to do some sightseeing. We went to Cape Henry which is apparently where the folks that settled Jamestown first landed in 1607. We toured the old lighthouse there and checked out the sights.

Jamie wanted to see Virginia Beach (even though it was about 50 degrees out). We went down to the strip and grabbed a bite to eat then walked on the beach. It was super windy out and there were TONS of surfers out! Insane! They must have been freezing their tushes off!!

We also hit up the Navy Exchange for some good tax-free deals before heading home to watch the SURVIVOR finale!! (Stupid Todd!)

Bring It On

With previews of Bring It On: In It to Win It all over tv, I got to thinking about how much I love the original Bring It On. Almost everyone that has seen it has a secret appreciation for this movie, regardless of age & gender. There is just something slightly addictive about it.

I was talking about this with Jamie last night. (Lee claims to have never seen Bring It On. I'm suspicious. He watches Grey's Anatomy for goodness sakes!) There is one scene in this otherwise classic that just makes our skin crawl.

Check out the video from You Tube in the post below.

It is the scene where Cliff has made a tape of a song he wrote for Torrence. She starts listening to it looking confused. Pretty soon she is bobbing her head. This head bob gets rather excessive and soon she is too-preppy-to-head-bang-head-banging. This is awkward enough. Then, out of nowhere she jumps up on her bed, grabs her pom poms and starts having a seizure. At least I WISH I could tell myself that is what happened, but really she is dancing. Now, how can a girl that is going to Nationals for cheerleading be this horribly awful of a dancer? I'm not sure. Everytime I watch this movie (pretty much whenever I see it on tv), I have to leave the room at this part. It is just way too traumatizing for me. In the meantime... I SAID BRRR. IT'S COLD IN HERE. MUST BE SOME TORROS IN THE ATMOSPHERE.

You're Just What I Need

The worst scene in the movie. Is anyone else embarassed for her?

Remember when...

Ahow used to wear drinking gloves???

I saw some at Auto Zone and had a flashback to him always wearing gloves when he was drinking at a bar. And somehow he still picked up chicks... Sometimes.

Chubby Chaser?

Call me shallow, but has anyone else wondered how a 400 lb, 25 year old guy had such a thin, hot girlfriend?? Is she a chubby chaser? Am I the only one that has wondered this??

Sure doesn't feel like December

Guess what's on the way...

I just got the email from Netflix saying that disc 1 is on its way!!! I am so excited I may pee my pants!! Now I just need to remember what was happening at the end of Season 2...

Women put drunken, barfy pix on Web

With that CNN headline, how could I NOT click on the link to read on...

Young women drink, party, post

I think my favorite part was this:

"The moderator has posted two photos of herself on the site: one with two beer bottles in her mouth..."

Classic!! You mean like this???

Replaced Hoosier - The move home...

As of right now, it looks like I will be moving back to Indiana in April of 2008. I am pretty excited! Lee has to go on a 7 week "underway" in April, and he is hoping to be done with the Navy in early June. Therefore, there is no point in me being alone in Norfolk for 7 weeks!

Right now Lee and I are looking at houses in DeMotte, IN. This is about 1.5 hours from Chicago and about 1 hour from Lafayette. I think this will be about the perfect mid-poing between work/family/friends. Anything is going to seem close after being down here in Norfolk!!

POW/MIA Table Set for One

I found what was read at the Anzio Christmas party about the Table Set for One.

As you entered the dining area this evening, you may have noticed a small table in the place of honor near our head table. It is set for one. The military caste is filled with symbolism. This table is our way of symbolizing the fact that the members of our profession of arms are missing from our midst. They are commonly called, POW/MIA. We call them brothers. They are unable to be with us this evening and so we remember them because of their incarceration.

This table set for one is small, symbolizing the frailty of one prisoner alone against his oppressors. Remember!

The tablecloth is white, symbolizing the purity of their intentions to respond to their country’s call to arms. Remember!

The single rose displayed in a vase reminds us of the families and loved ones of our comrades-in-arms who kept the faith awaiting their return. Remember!

The red ribbon tied so prominently on the vase is reminiscent of the red ribbon worn upon the lapel and breasts of thousands who bear witness to their unyielding determination to demand a proper accounting of our missing. Remember!

A slice of lemon is on the bread plate to remind us of their bitter fate. Remember!

There is salt upon the bread plate symbolic of families’ tears as they wait. Remember!

The glass is inverted, they cannot toast with us this night. Remember!

The chair, the chair is empty, they are not here. Remember!

All of you who served with them and called them comrades, who depended upon their might and aid, and relied upon them, for surely, they have not forsaken you. Remember!

Until the day they come home, Remember!

At this point they poured a glass of water for the empty table and then we all toasted with water.

If I had a million dollars

I hate that song...

But, if I had a million dollars, I would consider buying this. Imagine, my own ISLAND. In INDIANA. I am so pumped that I no longer need to go somewhere crappy and tropical to buy my own island. I can do it and still stay within 65 miles of West Lafayette! What could be better?

What all does this island offer for $1million??

• 50 ft of pier


• a powerful deck boat


• 2 boat lifts


• 4 kayaks


• 1.25 acres part of which is nature preserve-esque


• a 12'x12' swim deck


• a small amount of space on the "shore" to park your cars


• a Cadillac is included!


• your address is 1 Treasure Island, Rochester, Indiana 46975. How cool is that?


• oh, and you get a house too

This is one sweet setup!! I know what I'm asking Santa for this Christmas!

An Anzio Christmas

Last night was Lee's ship's Christmas party. Since I have only been to corporate Christmas parties, I had no idea what to expect. The main differences I saw:

• We had to pay for booze. Now, this is understandable because I can't even imagine what a mess it would be if you provided 400 dudes with an average age of 21 free booze. I am guessing there would be quite a few arrests. The annoying part was that you had to buy drink tickets and then get in line for the bar and get your actual drink. Annoying!


• The clothes. They made the rule that you couldn't wear jeans. Apparently a few people didn't get the memo. There were also people that wore khaki's, but with a sweatshirt. Even one of the ship big wigs was wearing a turtleneck sweater with a blazer over it... Not sure about that one... But, those were the more mild outfits. There was a girl, I kid you not, wearing a belly dancer outfit. There was a white dude that was dressed like some sort of mafia gangster. There was a guy wearing some of the brightest blue pants I have ever seen with blue dress shoes to match. I could have watched all night long.


• They had to BRIBE people to come. Basically, if you showed up to the FREE dinner, you got to take Friday off. Who in their right mind would choose to work on a Friday instead of eating a free meal on Thursday?


• The night started off with three guys bringing in the flags and playing the National Anthem. Then there was a prayer. Then there was a poem-type salute to the POW's & MIA's. This part was kind of cool. There was a small one person table set up at the front. It was left empty to symbolize the fact that the fallen sailors could not be with us there. Is it dusty in here?

(This is a really bad picture of the table for one...)


• The door prizes. Awesome! Of the 5 guys at our table, 3 of them won stuff. (Lee was not one of them. Boo!) The prizes ranged from a free day off work to a 42" flat screen tv. I would have loved to have that... Also, once all the door prizes were gone, people really bailed on the party.
(The losing ticket.)


• At the end of dinner, they turned on rap music and some people started dancing. This was the first time I got to see all ages of black dudes doing the "Soulja Boy" dance. It's pretty hard to describe, but part of the time it looks like they are riding a motorcycle, and everytime they say "Superman" they pretend like they're flying. At this point, the chick in the belly dancer outfit and her man were doing what looked like ballroom dancing. Where am I?

(Anzio's finest.)



• At the end of the night, I drank too much wine and now am at work feeling like crap while Lee sleeps in soundly on his day off. Somehow I feel screwed on this deal!

This picture has the USS Anzio's "Individual Augmentees". Now, I am NOT a big fan of the whole IA program. As a spouse, I am guessing that is no surprise. The IA program basically takes people that joined the Navy and sends them off to Iraq with the Army & Marines. This just seems like false advertising to me. In the real world, I could not get hired to be an actuary, then find out they are making me move to Alaska to be an accountant. I understand that the Army & Marines are short handed over in Iraq. But if this program continues, the Navy will soon be in the same situation. Every time someone reenlists or changes roles in the Navy, they get sent to Iraq for a year in the middle. This just means people aren't going to reenlist. It may cause people to not sign up in the first place.

There is a guy on Lee's ship who just got back from deployment in May. He is now going to Iraq for a year, so he will get home in 2009. Then he will have to go on another deployment with the ship 3 months later. How does that seem fair? He is doing his job in the Navy with an extra YEAR of Army work thrown in the middle. They already spent last Christmas in the Persian Gulf. Now they are spending this year on the ground in Iraq. I appreciate their service and I hope that they all return safely. And hopefully get a Christmas at home sometime in the next 3 years!

Silly Gun Control!

FACTS TO PONDER:
(A) The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000
(B) Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year are 120,000
(C) Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171.
(Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of Health Human Services.)

Now think about this:
Guns:
(A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000.
(B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year, all age groups, is 1,500.
(C) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is .000188
(Statistics courtesy of the FBI.)

So, doctors are more dangerous than gun owners.

Remember, 'Guns don't kill people, doctors do.'

VS.

Dillema

There is a girl on Facebook that I really want to stalk (I mean catch up on her life), but I had previously been refusing to be her friend because she hooked up with Lee one night during the 4 years we were broken up...

Does my curiosity outweigh my spite?

Update: I am now friends with this female on Facebook. She is a pharmacist in Boston. Just another reason that is a lame city.

Work Rant

You know what I hate about being an actuary?

Exams, yes...

But today I am talking about benefit calculations. They are usually pretty basic calculations that a high school student could do, but they can take forever because you have to double & triple check stuff since it has to be exact. You have to check the rounding and all that jazz. (I prefer big challenging calculations where you can have a margin of error, apparently.) And the client is always bugging you to get them back quickly. Ugh!

The only good thing about them is when the people have funny names. Right now I am working on a calc for someone named Shawn-Ta. Very phoenetic spelling!

MILF's have SPIRIT!

From the airline that brought us "Pukey Pants has Spirit", we now have an ad based on MILF's.

On Spirit's web site they are calling the offer the "MILF" sale; short for "Many Island, Low Fares."

Some Internet bloggers have pointed that "MILF" is known as an obscene acronym in some circles. It is used to describe an attractive older woman.

Some bloggers suggest the use of "MILF" is an unintentional oversight by the airline.

Others say Spirit knows exactly what they are doing. They point to the image of a Caribbean island in the ad that has been altered to resemble a reclining woman.

Ha! It does look like a woman laying down... Awesome.

Finally made it past Arlington

Since the middle of May, I have been spending two days every other week in McLean, VA. This is 13 miles from downtown Washington DC. Which makes it pretty pathetic that I had NEVER been to DC...

Friday was our company Christmas party/Cheiron's 5th Anniversary party. So, Saturday morning, Lee and I headed into DC. Lee had been there once when he was really young, but he doesn't remember it.

@ the WWII Memorial (I really do love Indiana.)

We hit up all the monuments and memorials, saw the capital building, and the White House. We managed to find free parking on the street in two different locations and only spent $$ on lunch. It was a very quick tour, but it's all we needed.

Lee holding the Washington Monument. Classic.

Also, I saw this pin and thought of someone. See if you can guess who...

And no, I'm not planning to vote for Hillary. I just took this picture to make my father-in-law's head explode!

Ahow Beware!

And I'm not talking about him getting called out on Clint's blog.

I'm talking about this!

Apparently the transvestites in Memphis aren't quite as friendly as the ones Ahow met down in Atlanta.